12 Steps: Step Five - Gotta Tell Somebody

12 Steps: Step Five

   Step Five in the 12 Step process is about bringing our unacceptable behavior out of the closet and confessing to ourselves, to God and to another trusted person habits, behaviors and addiction. This is not an easy step, but then, none of the steps are easy.

   It is a good thing when we can finally admit to ourselves that our behavior has caused problems in our relationships and in other areas of our life, but that is just the first step in our recovery process.

   Now we are being asked to bare our soul before God and another human being. In my own story that was a very difficult step to take. I believe that if I had been willing to take that step much earlier I could have saved myself and others much pain, but, my ego wouldn't give in.

   For years I thought I could conquer this thing, then slowly I came to the conclusion that I would never be free of it. I finally reconciled myself to the idea that this was just my cross to bear - and it was a heavy cross. Discovering the 12 steps with applications from the scripture gave me hope for full recovery.

   The day came when I was sick of myself and tired enough of trying over and over again to stop, that I took the step I didn't ever think I would take. I shared my secret with my wife and then to a trusted friend. From that moment on everything changed. And the change was for the better.

   In my own recovery I discovered the difference between guilt and shame. Guilt is a healthy thing. It is our conscience telling us we have done something wrong and we need to make it right. Shame comes out when we don't listen to our conscience and hide the guilt behind our defenses that we set up to protect our ego. We often slide into denial and wind up transferring the blame for our behavior onto others.

   When shame is brought out into the open it begins to dissolve into guilt and we can deal with guilt. Shame brought out into the open is comparable to being afraid of the night but then someone turns on the light and you see that there really wasn't anything to be afraid of.  

   There is a Scripture that reads, "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed" (James 5:16). That doesn't mean that we are to get a loud speaker and broadcast it all over the country, but it does mean that we should find a responsible spiritual leader and talk to them about our inventory issues.

   If you have faithfully completed step four of the 12 steps then you are ready to take the plunge into step five. We have materials which will help you through this process. I encourage you to visit  God Walk - Journey of Faith

  You will find a lot of good information to help you on your journey of faith and recovery from undesirable behaviors.  

We offer a short course of five lessons that give an overview of the recovery process and we want you to have it free – without cost or obligation. To get this short course CLICK HERE

Also, get a guide to the 12 steps by clicking here

We would love to answer any questions you have, or to get your response to what you have found here. Please fill in the form "Help Us Get To Know You" in the column to the right and let us know what you are thinking.

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